Tag Archives: mortality

Ann Yearsley, “Soliloquy”

ANN YEARSLEY

Soliloquy

 

—What folly to complain,
Or throw my woes against the face of Heaven?
Ills, self-created, prey upon my soul,
And rob each coming hour of soften’d Peace.
What then? Is Fate to blame? I chose distress;                                   5
Free will was mine; I might have still been happy
From a fore-knowledge of the dire effect,
And the sad bondage of resistless love.
I knew the struggles of a wounded mind,
Not self-indulging, and not prone to vice,                                           10
Knew all the terrors of conflicting passion,
Too stubborn foe, and ever unsubdu’d;
Yet rashly parley’d with the mighty victor.
Infectious mists upon my senses hang,
More deadly than LETHEAN dews which fall                                        15
From SOMNUS’ bough, on the poor wearied wretch,
Whose woes are fully told!—
The dire contagion creeps thro’ all my frame,
Seizes my heart, and drinks my spirit up.
Ah! fatal poison, whither dost thou tend?                                              20
Tear not my soul with agonizing pains;
There needs no more; the world to me is lost,
And all the whirl of life-unneeded thrift.
I sicken at the Sun, and fly his beams,
Like some sad ghost which loves the moonless night,                         25
And pensive shuns the morn. The deep recess
Where dim-ey’d Melancholy silent sits,
Beckoning the poor desponding slighted wretch,
Suits well. ‘Tis here I find a gloomy rest;
‘Tis here the fool’s loud clatter leaves me still,                                       30
Nor force unwilling answers to their tale:
But, ah! this gloom, this lethargy of thought,
Yields not repose; I sigh the hour away;
The next rolls on, and leaves me still opprest.
But, oh! swift-footed Time, thou ceaseless racer,                                   35
Thou who hast chac’d five thousand years before thee,
With all their great events, and minute trifles,
Haste, with redoubled speed, bring on the hour,
When dark Oblivion’s dusky veil shall shroud
Too painful Memory. —                                                                               40

NOTES:

15 LetheanPertaining to the river Lethe; hence, pertaining to or causing oblivion or forgetfulness of the past” (OED).

16 Somnus Roman god of sleep.

23 thrift “Means of thriving; industry, labour; profitable occupation” or “prosperous growth; physical thriving” (OED).

38 Redoubled “To double (a thing) for a second or further time; (also) to double repeatedly” (OED).

Source: Poems, on Several Occasions, fourth edition (London, 1786), pp. 58-60.  [Google Books]

 Edited by Willis Plowman

[Anne Wharton], “The Retirement”

[ANNE WHARTON]

“The Retirement”

 

All flie th’ unhappy, and I all wou’d flie,
Knew I but where to go, or how to die.
A Tomb of Sorrow is a dreadful Sight,
No wonder that a moving Grave shou’d fright.
Abandon’d, helpless, and alone I came                                                            5
From nothing to this World; from Ease to Pain
My infant Sighs did the small Fabric shake,
As Winds Pent in when from the Earth they Break,
Which Mortal Men for dismal Omens take.
‘Twas then alas! by certain Instinct taught,                                                      10
As if inspir’d by some prophetic Thought,
My Parents fled that World, to which this Wretch they brought.
They fear’d to see what I was Born to prove,
They fled from Youth, from Beauty, and from Love,
But ‘twas to meet again in Groves above.                                                        15
An Assignation justly tim’d, and kept,
The last undaunted went, and boldly leapt
That Gulph of Death her dearer half had past,
Desire of Liberty her Hopes encreas’d;
Love lent her Wings and added to her Hast                                                     20
But all too Slow, too late she was releas’d.
Too late for me, for had she sooner fled,
She with her own, had burst my twisted Thred;
That Thred, which since the Sisters Wove so Strong
As if they meant to prove their Force was young.                                           25
As in the Worlds bright dawn, when sprightly Life
Was Proof against Diseases, Age, and Grief.
Then Men cou’d live in Spight of every dart
That Death cou’d fling, nor fear’d a broken Heart.
But I, who had observ’d their Force Decay,                                                      30
And that each Chance cou’d clear to Death the Way;
From Grief expected long that mournful Ease,
And learn’t to smile at every Pains Encrease.
But now alas! those Fatal Hopes decay,
Inspite of Sorrow I must longer Stay;                                                                35
My Pilgrimage is hard and long the Way.
Too long the Way thro’ which I still must grieve,
Ah! for what Crime am I condemn’d to live?
“Else thro’ th’ Abyss I’d Steer my airy Race,
And view the Secrets of the boundless Space.                                                 40
Survey those glittering Particles of Light,
That with dissembled Day supply the Night.
Thence to the Source of Day direct my wondrous Flight.
The Hidden Cause of things unknown discrie,
The Strange Vicissitudes of Earth, of Air, and Skye.                                         45
Why some so prone to change, to some again
Such firm, and Stedfast, constant Rules Remain
I wou’d go on but that the towring flight,
Makes me grow giddy, with the dreadful hight,
Yes I wou’d forward, and my Voice I’d raise,                                                    50
Join with the Spheres in my Creator’s Praise,
In Songs Eternal, and no mortal Lays.
As ‘tis his Will; but who that will can see
Involv’d in such dark Clouds of Mistery.”
We know not what his will commands us here,                                              55
Less can we tell our future duty there.
Yes, here I’m lost, for none of all the dead,
Return to tell what a Soul is when fled.
Of what we there will do, we here may boast,
But there for ought we know All thought is lost.                                            60
To live, or Die why should I not submit?
Or why delay My death, or hasten it?
Since all is guided by his boundless Will,
For sure the Soul his Wisdom made, his Pow’r continues Still.

NOTES:

 Author “The Retirement” first appeared in print (unattributed) in Charles Gildon’s A New Miscellany of Original Poems, On Several Occasions (1701). However, in her The Surviving Works on Anne Wharton (1997), Germaine Greer attributes “The Retirement” to Anne Wharton through an earlier, undated manuscript version of the poem, titled “Thoughts occasioned by her retirement into the Countrey,” which Greer uses as her copy-text. The two versions differ substantially in word/spelling variation, but most notably in length, as the MS poem contains 89 lines (25 more than the 1701 text). Greer attributes these textual variations to the “editorial principles” of Gildon, who was known for both pirating and editing other poets’ work.

1 flie Fly “To leave;…to pass away” (Johnson).

4 fright. Punctuation added to the end of this line (printer’s error).

7 Fabric The OED definition references a “frame” or “structure,” which here is the infant’s small body.

8 Pent Emended from “Pen’t” in the copy text (printer’s error).

9 dismal “Boding or bringing misfortune; sinister” (OED).

12 fled “Pass away quickly and suddenly” (OED).

16 Assignation “An appointment to meet; used generally of love appointments” (Johnson).

20 Hast Archaic spelling of “haste.”

24 Sisters Wove A reference to the Three Fates in Greek mythology, who are often personified as women “who spin the thread of human destiny” (Encyclopedia Britannica).

25 Force “Power to influence, affect, or control” (OED).

28 Spight Alternative spelling of “spite.”

38 Crime Emended from “Crime;” (printer’s error).

39 airy “Celestial; immaterial” (OED).

44 discrie Alternative spelling of “descry,” “To catch sight of, observe, discover” (OED).

45 Skye Emended from “Siye” (printer’s error).

51 Spheres Emended from “Sphere’s” (printer’s error); Creator’s Emended from “Creators” (printer’s error)

54 Mistery Alternative spelling of “mystery.”

59 here Emended from “hear” (printer’s error).

 SOURCE: A New Miscellany of Original Poems, on Several Occasions (London, 1701), pp. 288-292.

Edited by Katarina Wagner

Anonymous, “Sickness. An Ode”

ANONYMOUS

“SICKNESS. An ODE”

From the GRUBSTREET JOURNAL.

 

At midnight when the fever rag’d,
By physic’s art still unasswag’d,
And totur’d me with pain:
When most it scorch’d my acking head,
Like sulph’rous fire, or liquid lead,                                        5
And hiss’d through every vein:

With silent steps approaching nigh,
Pale death stood trembling in my eye,
And shook th’ up-lifted dart:
My mind did various thoughts debate                                 10
Of this, and of an after state,
Which terrify’d my heart.

I thought ‘twas hard, in youthful age,
To quit this fine delightful stage,
No more to view the day;                                                15
Nor e’er again the night to spend
In social converse with a friend,
Ingenious, learn’d, and gay.

No more in curious books to read
The wisdom of th’ illustrious dead;                                        20
All that is dear to leave,
Relations, friends, and MIRA too,
Without one kiss, one dear adieu,
To moulder in the grave.

Incircled with congenial clay,                                                  25
To worms and creeping things a prey,
To waste, dissolve, and rot:
To lie wrapp’d cold within a shroud,
Mingled amongst the vilest crowd,
Unnoted, and forgot.                                                        30

Oh horror by this train of thought
My mind was to distraction brought,
Impossible to tell:
The fever rag’d still more without,
Whilst dark despair, or dismal doubt,                                    35
Made all within my hell.

At length, with grave, yet cheerful air
Repentance came, serenely fair,
As summer’s evening sun;
At sight of whom extatic joy                                                     40
Did all that horrid scene destroy;
And every fear was gone.

If join’d in consort, with one voice,
Angels at such a change rejoice;
I heard their joy exprest.                                                   45
If there be music in the spheres,
That music struck my ravish’d ears,
And charm’d my soul to rest.

NOTES:

Title The Grubstreet Journal (January 1730-1738) was a critical and satirical newspaper published weekly in London (The Library of Congress).

2 unasswag’d An archaic spelling of unassuaged; “not soothed or relieved” (Oxford Dictionaries [no definition given in OED]).

24 moulder “To decay to dust; to rot; to crumble” (OED).

25 congenial “Suited to the nature of” (OED).

43 consort “To keep company with; to escort or attend” (OED).

Source: The Gentleman’s Magazine (January 1733), p. 42.

 Edited by Valerie Pedroche

William Dingley, “Upon a Bee Entomb’d in Amber”

[WILLIAM DINGLEY]

Upon a BEE Entomb’d in Amber.”

 

Behold this happy Insect’s Tomb,
Not sweet, but precious Honey-comb:
You’d think the Bee had brought it forth,
Alike in Colour, and in Worth.
Which to the view does represent,                                                     5
A Murderer, and Monument.
I thought ‘twas Niobe alone,
Whom Moisture harden’d into Stone:
But now the weeping Gem I see,
Transforms at once it self and Bee:                                                    10
Since to Beholders each does seem,
The Gem a Bee, the Bee a Gem.
The Pyramids in Egypt’s Land,
Astonishment from all command:
Yet, happy insect, happy thou,                                                             15
A lesser, but a better Show;
The Pyramids would envy me,
Should I be thus Entomb’d like thee.
Thou with Medusa may’st compare,
Whose Viperous enchanted Hair,                                                         20
Turn’d all Spectators into Stone,
Conquest and Trophy both in one;
But thou excellest her in this,
Thy self at once Medusa is,
Thy self the Metamorphosis.                                                                  25
Nature has chang’d her usual course,
But for the Better not the Worse;
While Jewels sprout from Poplar-Trees,
These bring forth Jewels, Jewels Bees.
Thus whilst the Bee through Amber shone,                                         30
With borrow’d Lustre, not her own,
The Sight so dazling did appear,
You’d think both Bees, both Jewels were.
The Golden Beast, like Bacchus Crown,
Translated to th’Ethereal Throne,                                                           35
Does, as it were, refin’d appear,
Transform’d from Gold into a Star:
Congeal’d it lies in sparkling Gem,
You’d swear ‘twas froze to Death in Flame.
Entangled there it self does shew,                                                         40
A Labyrinth, and Monster too.
What Freeman would not pay that Fee
Which Prisoners give for Liberty,
To share in this Captivity.
The little Debtor (she, you know,                                                   45
To Amber does this Yellow owe)
Thither as to her Prison came,
Her Debt and Prison both the same.
A worthy, honourable Cheat!
Whose very Fetters made her Great:                                                    50
For while she mute in Thraldome lies,
Her buzzing Fame much swifter flies.
Tho’ she confin’d, to us may seem,
Within the Limits of a Gem,
She’s in effect, by being thus,                                                                  55
Extended through the Universe:
And by her forc’d, yet willing stay,
Debar’d from Flying, flies away.
Whose Hive, not long since, Thatcht we saw,
Like Rome’s old Capitol, with Straw;                                                        60
She now in nobler Structure dwells,
Which Rome’s new Capitol excells.
Thou worthy Nurse of mighty Jove,
Supreme o’re all the Gods above;
Tell me, thou Insect, tell me why,                                                            65
When Harlots mounted to the Sky,
He did not thus thy Pains repay,
Deserving Heaven more than they?
But lo! I see thy proud Disdain
Has rendred Deifying vain.                                                                       70
So rich, so glorious they Attire,
A radiant, not a burning Fire;
That all those Lamps which grace the Sky,
Are seen Unenvy’d by thy Eye.
‘Twere Injury to fix thee there,                                                                 75
A brighter Constellation here.
Such is the dazling Garb she wears,
Such Honour from the Garb she bears,
That tho’ her Jove be cloath’d with Rays
Immortal, and immortal Praise;                                                               80
‘Tis doubtful which does most confer,
The Bee on Jove, or Jove on her:
While she her self does represent,
As if to give the God, she meant,
Honour, instead of Nutriment.                                                                 85
Proud Animal! ‘tis mere Self-love,
Which makes thee like Narcissus prove;
Who view’d, himself in Chrystal Streams,
And, as he view’d, thence gather’d Flames:
In liquid Gum you clearer shine,                                                               90
Others to Envy you incline,
Whilst you your self for Love repine.
True Looking-glass, wherein we view,
Not only Form, but Matter too.
The Eyes, which view this glorious Bee,                                                   95
Are held almost as fast as she:
For while they gaze, in one, they view
Artificer, and Image too.
‘Twas heedlessness this Artist taught,
Exact the Figure, yet not wrought;                                                             100
Whom like Sejanus here we see,
Too truly slain in Effigy.
Fair Phaethusa (Stories shew)
A Poplar-tree by Weeping grew;
Weeping (Oh! had it sooner came)                                                             105
Enough to quench her Brother’s Flame.
Hence first distill’d the precious Juice,
And Trees the Amber did produce;
From whence a three-fold Change we see,
From humane Shape sproughts up a Tree,                                               110
Thence came forth Gum, and thence a Bee.
A Bee, which thus you may divide,
Object of Pity, and of Pride:
It Sister does, and Brother seem,
It Weeps like her, it Shines like him;                                                           115
In both their Fates does Sympathize,
At once bewails the Dead, and Dies.
Virgin, too like the Crocodile!
Whose treach’rous Tears to Snares beguile,
Thy Weeping’s, by Experience known,                                                        120
More Envious now than Pitteous grown.
Thy Tears, which first made thee a Tree,
And now again transform the Bee,
Harden themselves, and that, like Thee.
See how from Good, ariseth Ill!                                                                    125
While they bewail the Slain, they Kill.
But why, against th’ industrious Bee,
Do Trees exert such Cruelty?
She little thinking e’re to yield,
Securely Plunder’d all the Field;                                                                    130
For which she now in Chains must stay,
Chains richer than her former Prey.
Flowers, too weak to captive Bees,
Assistance crave from neighbour Trees;
Till they that were opprest before,                                                              135
Retort the Dammage once they bore:
But Oh! tis thus, they add the more,
And, to deprive, increase the Store.
The cruel Nero, who (says Fame)
Rome doubly Dy’d in Blood and Flame,                                                       140
Erected no such noble Throne;
No, tho’ he built a Golden One,
As that wherein this Tyrant shone.
Most radiant, most illustrious Bee,
I’ll to the Phoenix liken thee,                                                                        145
In Death as rare, as bright as She;
Tho’ She to Phoebus owe his Night,
Extinguish’d by the Beams of Light;
Tho’ thou a distant Fate dost bear,
Drown’d in the Deluge of a Tear.                                                                150
Thy waxen Wings the Fate has fought,
Which those of Icarus once brought;
The cause whereby (as Stories tell)
So High he soar’d, so Deep he fell.
Yet thee much Happier I esteem,                                                              155
Not over-whelm’d, tho’ drown’d like him:
Thou more conspicuous dost appear
Than others above Water are,
Thy very Cov’ring makes thee clear.
Thou need’st not signalize thy Grave,                                                       160
With any specious Epitaph,
Thy Corps is so transparent seen
In Golden Characters within.
Thus Death, which never grants Reprieve,
Is here made Life’s Preservative.                                                               165
The dark Recesses of the Tomb,
Become a pleasant, lightsome Room.
Th’unnatural, but honest Grave,
From a Devourer, chang’d to save;
In Justice does its Debt repay,                                                                    170
And give the Life it takes away.
Thy Dipping Thetis has out-done,
Who strove to Eternize her Son;
Bathing him in the Stygian Lake,
That he might ne’re of Styx partake.                                                         175
Thou that effectually dost gain,
For which she Dipt, but dipt in vain.
The Bee with Hercules compare,
Her lustre may with Aeta’s share;
But not consume, not wasted be,                                                             180
And so gain Immortality.
Eternal Insect! who would grieve
To Dye like thee, like thee to Live?
Jove is a Mortal thought by some,
‘Cause ancient Creet can shew his Tomb;                                                185
Oh! were he Bury’d there like thee,
His Tomb would prove him Deity.

NOTES:

Title Amber “A yellowish translucent fossil resin. It is used for ornaments; burns with an agreeable odor; often entombs the bodies of insects” (OED).

7 Niobe In Greek mythology, her children were killed by Apollo and Artemis. She was so overwhelmed with grief that the gods turned her weeping form into a rock on Mount Sipylus (Encyclopædia Britannica).

11 Beholder “One who beholds, a watcher, looker on, spectator” (OED).

13 Pyramids in Egypt’s Land “Focal points of enormous funerary complexes constructed for the burials of Egyptian kings. In the classical tradition, pyramids have been constructed primarily as tombs, often in conscious emulation of Egyptian Precedent” (The Classical Tradition).

19 Medusa In Greek mythology, was changed by Athena to have snakes for hair and turn anyone who looked at her into stone (The Columbia Encyclopedia).

25 Metamorphosis “The action of process of changing in form, shape, or substance; transformation by supernatural means” (OED).

28 Jewels sprout from Poplar-Trees When Phaethon died, his sisters, the Heliades, wept and were turned into poplar trees and their tears into amber (Dictionary of Classical Mythology).

34 The Golden Beast The bee, but also an allusion to Midas, who was granted a wish from Bacchus to have everything he touches turn to gold (The Classical Tradition); Bacchus Also known as Dionysus in Greek mythology. The god of wine, mystic ecstasy, and the theater (The Classical Tradition).

35 Ethereal “Of or relating to heave, God, or the gods; heavenly, celestial” (OED).

41 Labyrinth, and Monster In Greek mythology, the monster is that of the Minotaur, composed of a man’s body and bull’s head, birthed from Pasiphae. The Labyrinth is the Cretan Labyrinth created by Daedalus to store the Minotaur in (Dictionary of Classical Mythology).

45 little Debtor The bee.

47 Thither “To or towards that place” (OED).

50 Fetters “A chain or shackle for the feet; a bond, shackle” (OED).

51 Thraldome “The state or condition of being a thrall; bondage, servitude; captivity” (OED).

59 Thatcht “Covered or roofed with thatch;” that is “straw, reeds, palm-leaves, etc., laid so as to protect from the weather” (OED).

62 new Capitol Possible reference to the reconstruction of the Capital building done by Michelangelo in the 16th century (The Columbia Encyclopedia).

63 Nurse In Greek mythology, Amaltheia was a she-goat who nursed an infant Zeus (Dictionary of Classical Mythology); Jove Another name for the supreme god of Roman mythology, Jupiter; also known as Zeus in Greek mythology. Determined course of human affairs and made known the future through signs in the heavens, flight of birds, and other means; lord of heaven and bringer of light (Brewer’s Dictionary of Phrase and Fable).

66 Harlots Likely a reference to Harpies; in Greek myth made of feathers, bronze, and flesh and had women’s faces, vulture’s bodies, and bronze talons (Bloomsbury Dictionary of Myth).

87 Narcissus In Greek mythology, famously beautiful boy who fell in love with his own reflection in the water and thus died of his infatuation (The Classical Tradition).

92 repine “To feel or express discontent or dissatisfaction; to grumble, complain” (OED).

101 Sejanus Lucius Aelius Sejanus (20 BC-AD31), Roman soldier and statesman; according to Juvenal, after Sejanus’s fall from power and execution his statuary was destroyed (Satire 10).  Possibly also a reference to Senjanus His Fall (1603), a satirical tragedy by Ben Jonson. In the play, Sejanus is driven by extreme ambition and attempts to occupy the Roman throne, exploiting the emperor Tiberius, but is eventually torn to pieces by the Roman mob (The Bloomsbury Dictionary of English Literature).

102 slain in Effigy “A likeness, portrait, or image; to inflict upon an image the semblance of the punishment which the original is considered to have deserved” (OED).

103 Phaethusa In Greek mythology, one of Helio’s daughters born from his mistress Neaera (Dictionary of Classical Mythology). See note 28.

118 Crocodile The phrase “crocodile tears” is meant as false or hypocritical tears (A Dictionary of Literary Symbols). “Was said to weep, either to allure a man for the purpose of devouring him, or while devouring him” (OED).

139 Nero (37AD-86AD), Roman emperor who turned to debauchery, extravagance, and tyranny. During his reign, two-thirds of Rome was destroyed by fire (Chambers Biographical Dictionary).

142 Golden One Palace, also known as Domus Aurea, built by Nero after the fire. The palace was notoriously grand and novel (The Classical Tradition).

145 Phoenix “In classical mythology: a bird resembling an eagle but with sumptuous red and gold plumage, which was said to live for five or six hundred years before burning itself to ashes on a funeral pyre ignited by the sun and fanned by its own wings, only to rise from its ashes with renewed youth to live through another such cycle” (OED).

147 Phoebus “Apollo as the god of light or of the sun; the sun personified” (OED).

152 Icarus In Greek myth, was the son of Daedalus who invented wings made out of wax and feathers. Icarus flew with these wings towards the sun and the heat loosened the wax and caused him to fall and drown in the ocean (Bloomsbury Dictionary of Myth).

161 specious “Fair or pleasing to the eye or sight; beautiful, handsome, lovely” (OED); Epitaph “An inscription upon a tomb; a brief composition characterizing a deceased person” (OED).

162 Corps Corpse.

172 Thetis Daughter of Nereus in Greek myth, was a beautiful sea-nymph who the Fates said would bear a son greater than his father (Bloomsbury Dictionary of Myth).

173 her Son The Greek hero, Achilles born from the sea-nymph Thetis and was half human from his father Peleus. Thetis tried to make him immortal by dipping him into the River Styx (Dictionary of Classical Mythology).

174 Stygian Lake “Pertaining to the river Styx” (OED).

175 Styx “A river of the lower world or Hades, over which the shades of the departed were ferried by Charon, and by which the gods swore their most solemn oaths” (OED).

180 Hercules “A celebrated hero of Greek and Roman mythology, who after death was ranked among the gods and received divine honors. He is represented as possessed of prodigious strength” (OED).

181 Aeta Archaic spelling of “Oeta” referring to Mt. Oeta in central Greece, the location of the funeral pyre for Heracles in Greek myth (also known as Hercules) (Dictionary of Classical Mythology).

185 Creet The Greek island, Crete.

Source: Poems on Several Occasions. Originals, and Translations ([London?], 1694), pp. 9-17. [Google Books]

Edited by Kasside Sahagun-Escalante

John Hawkesworth, “Life. An Ode”

[JOHN] HAWKESWORTH

“LIFE. An Ode”

 LIFE! The dear, precarious boon!
Soon we lose; alas, how soon!
Fleeting vision, falsely gay!
Grasp’d in vain, it fades away;
Mixing with surrounding shades,                                                    5
Lovely vision! how it fades!
Let the Muse, in Fancy’s glass,
Catch the phantoms as they pass.
See, they rise! a nymph behold,
Careless, wanton, young, and bold;                                                10
Mark her devious, hasty pace,
Antick dress, and thoughtless face;
Smiling cheeks, and roving eyes,
Causeless mirth, and vain surprise—
Tripping at her side, a boy                                                                 15
Shares her wonder, and her joy:
This is Folly, Childhood’s guide;
This is Childhood, at her side.
What is he succeeding now,
Myrtles blooming on his brow,                                                          20
Bright and blushing, as the morn;
Not on earth a mortal born?
Shafts, to pierce the strong, I view;
Wings, the flying to pursue:
Victim of his pow’r, behind                                                                 25
Stalks a slave of human kind,
Whose disdain of all the free,
Speaks his mind’s captivity.
Love’s the tyrant, Youth the slave;
Youth, in vain, is wise or brave:                                                         30
Love, with conscious pride, defies
All the brave, and all the wise.
Who art thou, with anxious mien,
Stealing o’er the shifting scene?
Eyes, with tedious vigils red,                                                               35
Sighs, by doubts and wishes bred:
Cautious step, and glancing leer,
Speak thy woes, and speak thy fear.
Arm and arm, what wretch is he
Like thyself, who walks with thee?                                                    40
Like thy own his fears and woes,
All thy pangs his bosom knows.
Well, to well! my boding breast
Knows the names your looks suggest;
Anxious, busy, restless pair!                                                              45
Manhood, link’d by Fate to Care.
Wretched state! and yet ‘tis dear.
Fancy, close the prospect here!
Close it, or recal the past,
Spare my eyes, my heart the last.                                                    50
Vain the wish! the last appears,
While I gaze, it swims in tears.
Age—my future self – I trace,
Moving slow with feeble pace;
Bending with disease and cares,                                                     55
All the load of life he bears:
White his locks, his visage wan,
Strength, and ease, and hope, are gone.
Death, the shadowy for I know!
Death o’ertakes him, dreadful foe!                                                  60
Swift they vanish—mournful sight;
Night succeeds, impervious night!
What these dreadful glooms conceal,
Fancy’s glass can ne’er reveal.
When shall time the veil remove?                                                   65
When shall light the scene improve?
When shall truth my doubts dispel?
Awful period! Who can tell?

NOTES:

 1   boon “A gift considered with reference to its value to the receiver; a benefit enjoyed, blessing, advantage, a thing to be thankful for: sometimes without even the notion of giving, but always with that of something that one has no claim to, or that might have been absent” (OED).

7 Fancy “Imagination, a mental image” (OED).

12 Antick “Grotesque, in composition or shape, bizarre” (OED).

20 Myrtles “Any of various evergreen shrubs or small trees of the genus Myrtus” (OED).

 23 Shaft “The long slender rod forming the body of a lance or spear, or of an arrow” (OED).

 33 mien “The look, bearing, manner, or conduct of a person, as showing character, mood, etc.” (OED).

37 leer “A side glance, a look or roll of the eye expressive of slyness, malignity, immodest desire, etc.” (OED).

SOURCE: Lady’s Poetical Magazine, vol. III (London, 1782), pp. 142-44. [Hathi Trust]

Edited by Kyla Asbell